The Negativity Trap
I spent time with a friend from out of town recently, a friend who I feel very comfortable with. You know, one of the ones you can let your guard down around and just be yourself? We had a blast together, and I’m so glad that we had time to visit. But as she was sharing stories about her day-to-day, I started to hear some patterns of negativity and judgment woven through them. Before I could stop myself, I jumped in with complaints of my own. I am struck by how easily I can fall into that trap, how easily influenced I am. It just takes one mention of an aggravating situation at work or a frustrating conversation with the hubby, and I can jump right in with stories of my own…and not ones that are spreading sunshine (if you know what I mean!)
This is NOT cool with me! I want to be the kind of person who responds to negativity by either keeping my mouth shut or by redirecting the conversation. And I certainly don’t want to be the one who starts the complaint-downward-spiral! That’s not the type of influence I want to have. So, I’m working on it. What if the words that we use built up instead of tearing down? Imagine the power of THAT influence!
Yeah, this is a hard thing. Finding the balance between being real and being a downer. We are so easily influenced by those we associate with. I am convinced, now more than ever, that you have to at least have a section of friends who will left you up.
I recognize the tendency in myself to be negative and critical of others and I try so hard to not put my thoughts into words…someday I hope to be able to work on the thoughts. But, when I find out someone else is feeling the same way I am I feel justified in my criticalness…that’s when it all spills out. Thanks for this post and the reminder that our negativity is very contagious…maybe I need a face mask.
Great word, Ash. I see you as such a positive-spirit so I don't think you'll have a hard time breaking this tendency.
Thanks for the reminder to build up rather than tear down in our personal and professional trek.
This is so good and so true! With all the drama that has surrounded our family this year I have tried hard to be aware of my complaint meter. Thanks for this great reminder to keep looking at it!
Oh I love this and I feel the same way. With my work world being so negative I am trying not to let that overflow into my weekend
life. Thanks for sharing!
Great word, Ash. I see you as such a positive-spirit so I don’t think you’ll have a hard time breaking this tendency.
Thanks for the reminder to build up rather than tear down in our personal and professional trek.